Adrian Lloyd

Adrian Lloyd

Thursday, July 18th, 1968 - Saturday, June 4th, 2022
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Please share your favorite memory of Adrian to be included in a special keepsake book for the family.
Adrian Lloyd
Adrian Lloyd passed away peacefully, with his loving family by his side, following a long and courageous battle with cancer, at Marianhill Palliative Care, Pembroke on June 4, 2022 at the age of 53 years.

Adrian was the beloved son of Ron and Kate Lloyd, loved brother of Rebecca and Christian and loving uncle to Otis and Ian. Adrian was so loved by all his aunts, uncles and cousins in England.

A special thank you to all his singing friends from around the world on Singtopia/Smule, who made him happy and kept him going during his long illness. A big thank you to all our wonderful friends for their love and support during the last seven years. A special thank you to doctors Goodwin, Pantarotto, Parsons and Curry from the Ottawa General and the nurses on Ward 5 East. In Pembroke, thanks also to Dr. Mandie Bzdell and the nurses in Pembroke Regional Hospital and Palliative Care at Marianhill.

Funeral Services for Adrian’s Family will be private. Final Interment will take place in England.

As an expression of sympathy, donations may be made to the Ontario Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals or the Ottawa Regional Cancer Foundation if you wish. Condolences, tributes, donations

“Who is me?” – Celebrating the Life & Talents of Adrian Mark Lloyd
(July 18, 1968 – June 4, 2022) by Rebecca J. Lloyd

Who was Adrian Mark Lloyd? To many of you here and those following along on FaceBook Live, Adrian was a singer and someone who volunteered countless hours to forming and contributing to his online singing community --- his second family---Mary, Heidi, Maria, Nikki, Dave, Jess, and many more. I say with confidence, that one of the main reasons he lasted 7.5 years after his initial stage 4 pancreatic cancer diagnosis, is that his affiliations and interactions with Singtopia, Smule’s largest user-managed community, brought him to life and in a way gave him reason to continue to pursue life when all the odds were against him. To get a sense of his angelic voice one can just google “Adrian Lloyd” and “Smule” and treasures such as the Riptide (Vance Joy Cover) duet he sung seven years ago are preserved in digital space and time. I am sure for those who sung with and followed Adrian you all have a favourite song. Some that stand out for me include “Hallelujah”,“Skinny Love”,“Take me to Church”, and “How will I know?”.

Singing for Adrian was the ultimate connection to life. In the comfort of his home, particularly on the days he received difficult news or some sort of treatment such as chemotherapy, he would sing his heart out until 3 or 4 in the morning with others who were there singing along with him. When he sung, his ailments and worries faded away.His voice radiated out with the help of technology to special people all over the world who shared his passion for communicating deep emotion through voice. These connections were so strong that two “Go fund me” initiatives brought Adrian out of his shell, as he was very much a homebody, to sing with these newfound friends. Some of his highlights included travelling to Europe where he sang in an Amsterdam train station and auditioning for X Factor in England.

I titled this reflection on Adrian’s life “Who is Me?” because as his sister, and the one in our family who was closest in age to him, I had the privilege of seeing so many of his talents develop as the years passed by. For Adrian not only sung, he painted, was a make-up artist, professional hair stylist, and was a small business owner of “Dog Day Afternoon” - a dog walking service which he hoped to one day turn into a doggy daycare. He also did a degree in social work which he applied to his volunteer and advocacy role with the AIDS society of Ottawa. And more recently, he was passionate about raising awareness for gay men living with cancer as he was perturbed by the heteronormative assumptions that people with cancer are in some sort of straight relationship. Missing, in his perspective, were resources and awareness directed to gay men, particularly single gay men who have little support. I am hoping that in me raising what I consider to be unfinished business that his dream of promoting diversity in health care settings, from something as simple as posting a pride flag, could be picked up by someone hearing this today.

I am not the only one who was privy to Adrian’s many talents. Fifty-four years ago today he came into this world, giving our parents the gift of becoming “mother” and “father” for the first time. It was in the eyes of doting young parents that the talents of Adrian were first recognized. His feat of painting a fish by the age of 18 months was nothing short of genius! He was known for his bright eyes, wide smile &entertaining my parents’friends during their numerous parties.It was at these eventswhenhis alter ego “Sally” emerged – the beginnings of a Ru Paul contestant who took the floor with his cardigan draped over his head that served asa makeshift wig --a character who also, so I’ve heard, went around and polished off the remnants of everyone’s left over drinks. Yes, Adrian was the life of the party and my parent’s world.

While I know it is natural in these moments of celebration to sway toward the more positive stories, there is one event that profoundly shaped Adrian’s trajectory – a story that he often spoke of throughout his life, but only in his final week divulged more detail. At age 4 Adrian went to school at Ursuline Convent in Chester England. It was normal to start school that early in the UK and some of his schoolmates, namely Sue Callery and Claire Madden (now Mortimer), continued to stay in touch to this day. It was at this school where Adrian crossed paths with a nun, Sister Agnes (I believe) who wasn’t quite ready to embrace his intelligence & creative insight. One day Sister Anges, his teacher,introduced the parable of the talents. It went something like this – a rich master chose three servants, gave the first 1 talent, the second 2 talents and the third 5 talentsbefore he went on a long trip and advised them to care for his moneywhile he was away. (As a footnote I did some research and discovered that a talent in biblical times was worth approximately three months of wages.)The first servant fulfilled his duty by burying the talent to keep it safe while the other two took risks and doubled their fortunes. The story goes that the two who made a profit were rewarded and welcomed into the master’s kingdom while the servant who buried the talent and kept it safe was punished.

Upon hearing this parable, Adrian did not go along with the message that they were supposed to focus on -- to not hide one’s talents and to take risks -- as he truly believed that the servant who kept the talent safeby hiding it did the right thing because he was dutiful and obedient. Well, I suppose Sister Agnes was not ready to be shown up by a 4-year-old and instead of swallowing her pride, she took out herineptness and frustration on the days that followed. I won’t go into detail but after a few of his friends’ mothers noticed a change in Adrianas a result from being picked on, they convinced my mother to put him in a new school….but sadly only after some damage was done.

Maybe it was because of this momentthat when we would venture to the corner store a few steps from our house in Mollingtonto buy sweets, that I would point out what we both wanted, and he would give the correct change. It wasn’t until Adrian was older that he disclosed to me some of the challenges he continued to face because of that fateful interaction with that nun. It came as a surprise to me for in my eyes, as a little sister who looked up to her big brother, I only saw Adrian radiate in all his talents. He never hid them from me. Growing up in his company was an adventure! We would play outside in a massive backyard.There was a green lawn where our dog Scampi dribbled a soccer ball, a jungle like section with scary looking plants that Adrian told me were Venus fly traps that could eat humans alive, a slide and play structure, a “Wendy” house that my Dad built, a shed and patio stones where my mum hosted birthday parties, and in the very back, a fence that marked the beginnings of a farmer’s field with huge cow patties. If I ever fell or scraped myself on our backyard adventures, Adrian would advise me not to tell on him or he wouldn’t buy me “life size wedding dolls” for Christmas. I have no idea where he got the idea I would like these dolls, but as the days passed, they became more lifelike and elaborate and I was sure I was going to cash in on this gift. I am not sure if my parents ever knew the secret behind why we got along so well LOL….

Around this time when Adrian was about 5, healso created a fantasy world called the “whoismes”. A “whoisme” was a hand puppet who would tell me daily stories. Thesewhoisme adventures continued from these early years to the bedtime stories he would tell me when we moved to Canada in 1977. Never short on ideas, the whoisme clan grew from being a papa whoisme who married a mummy whoisme and even gave birth to baby whoismes.

I never stopped to consider the meaning behind the “who is me” name he gave the main character and the parallel meaning it may have had for the person he was becoming. From a quiet English school boy in uniform who experienced teasing in the form of “Adrian Lloyd the cuboid” to “Gaydrian” when he went to school in Petawawa and Pembroke, he never let those taunts stop him from figure skating in his elementary years to picking up the tuba in the high school band. I am not sure why he chose the largest instrument to not only play at school but also to bring home to practice. Adrian and his tuba would sit in the back of the school bus and take up an entire seat!

As his years went by and he ventured from Bishop Smith Catholic Highto Fellows High School and then to Ashbury College for his senior year, he continued to try new things including joining the football team. I just about fell over when I heard this news, but after finding out he was not given a choice, as it was an expectation for all senior boys, I know that it was an experience that was very special to him. He loved wearing his football jacket. And when I was sorting out his closet in the process of packing up his items to give away, I came across his green football shirt, something that he kept for over 30 years!

Spending time with Adrian in our 20s was always something I treasured. No matter where he lived, as he had several roommates over the years including Melina, Stephane, Alex, John, Robbie, & more recently Morgan, he always went out of his was to create a cozy feeling in his home. When you sat with Adrian you felt like time stopped. There was no issue in which he did not have an opinion or something insightful to say. Conversation was his speciality.

I am aware that not everyone who met Adrian got to see his many sides and talents. He had so many dreams & ideas that were ahead of his time. I often wished that he was head hunted by an organization to work in a think tank because knowing Adrian, he could ‘out think’ anyone! He grew up with the collective understanding in our family that he was the intelligent one, but sadly, his anxiety and battle with depression – something he attributes to “that nun” – stopped him from reaching his full potential… until the day he received his diagnosis of stage 4 pancreatic cancer.

For many, receiving news of a terminal illness would be completely crushing. For Adrian, however, it was a blessing in that he finally started to reveal his artistic talents to the world. Prior to his diagnosis, he focused on making a living from selling Cutco knives, life insurance, cutting hair, and more recently walking dogs. It was only after receiving the news that the end was in sight that he really started to live. He devoted more time to singing, travelling to places like Cuba, and putting himself in the limelight through his online singing community.

In my mind, through the medium of song, Adrian was sharing with the world his greatest talent and I am sure, like many of you, we got the sense that he was going to live forever. His final three weeks and rapid decline came as a surprise. You would think we would have prepared for his death given the seven years he lived with cancer. But Adrian was so focused on living, he didn’t even take time to imagine his death. About a week before he died, he told me that he wanted me to plan a celebration of his life in the Rockcliffe dog park. My response was,“Me? You want me to plan this? Who do you want to invite?”

“All the dogs”, he replied. And then added, “and their owners too”. I then asked, “How will be able to get in touch with them?” He said, “Talk to Bambie – she can get the word out”(so she quickly became my FaceBook friend and promoter – Bambie – thank you for spreading the word.) And then, with pen in hand I asked, “Adrian is there anything you want me to say?” To which he responded, “Don’t worry Rebecca. I will be there. I will speak.”I wasn’t sure if it was the hydromorphone talking or the belief that he really would be here, but I would like to pause for a moment to listen to what he has to say….

Being there for Adrian in his final days is the last gift I would like to touch upon today. As always, Adrian wanted to create a hospitable environment, even in the hospital. He would keep drinks & snacks from the meal trays to give to me, even cereal boxes he wanted me to take home for my sons. He played funny youtube videos for me such as Ru Paul’s drag race and skits by TrixeMatel and Katya on hoarding. And he wanted to go for walks. At the beginning of his three-week stay we went outside and found a bench near a garden. The next week we walked around the cancer ward with a walker. And in his final week, I pushed him in a wheelchair. No matter what his outer state and capabilities, he continued to be Adrian. His visit with Morgan and Simon, who came in to sign some legal documents as witnesses lifted his spirits. He greeted Simon with, “What --- stop looking at me like I am going to die!!!” Something that set us all off, including my brother Christian, into a fit of laughter. And he knew what was up because when I opened a bag of chips that Christian gave him a couple of days prior, he exclaimed – those are for me!!! I passed the bag over to him and texted Christian a pic of him eating those chips.Christian exclaimed, “How awesome is that!”

I have to say it was his final day that was the most painful. I walked into the Pembroke hospice at Marionhill, a place my parents were able to secure the day before and relieved my mother who was there overnight. It wasearly in the morningand I wondered what to do. I reached out to some of his Smule friends - Mary, Nikki and Maria- and told them the end was near. And then I got the idea to play some soft soothing music as I know that was what Adrian liked to do to relax. I searched up a calm karaoke playlist on Spotify and although I am a terrible singer compared to my brother, he seemed to respond well to my voice as I did my best to sing along through intermittent sobs. I sung Tears in Heaven, the Rose, and then a song I always chalked up to being completely cheezy – “My Heart Will Go On” by Celine Dion.

When I sang these words, although it was written as a love song, the message that the heart lives on rings true when it comes to Adrian. I feel that he is here today in spirit. And I am hoping that you will join me in singing this song today.Adrian, may your heart always live on.

Your loving sister, friend and fan,

Rebecca (Becky)

My Heart Will Go On
Every night in my dreams
I see you, I feel you
That is how I know you go on
Far across the distance
And spaces between us
You have come to show you go on
Near, far, wherever you are
I believe that the heart does go on
Once more, you open the door
And you're here in my heart
And my heart will go on and on
Love can touch us one time
And last for a lifetime
And never let go 'til we're gone
Love was when I loved you
One true time I'd hold to
In my life, we'll always go on
Near, far, wherever you are
I believe that the heart does go on (why does the heart go on?)
Once more, you open the door
And you're here in my heart
And my heart will go on and on
You're here, there's nothing I fear
And I know that my heart will go on
We'll stay forever this way
You are safe in my heart and
My heart will go on and on.
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  • Online Memory & Photo Sharing Event

    Online Event

    About this event

    In Loving Memory Of

    Adrian Lloyd

    July 18, 1968 - June 4, 2022

    Look inside to read what others have shared

    Family and friends are coming together online to create a special keepsake. Every memory left on the online obituary will be automatically included in this book.


We encourage you to share your most beloved memories of Adrian here, so that the family and other loved ones can always see it. You can upload cherished photographs, or share your favorite stories, and can even comment on those shared by others.

Private Condolence

Colin Freemark

Posted at 05:40am
Dr. and Mrs Lloyd, Rebecca and Christian, I am truly sorry to hear about Adrian and condolences to you and all your extended family. I think the last time I saw Adrian was at a dog park or walking my dog and ran into him doing the same years ago but have fond memories of your family in Pembroke when we were kids. My mother Louise Freemark and I were talking and she sends her sympathies as well.
Colin Freemark

Robert Squires

Posted at 07:28am
To Adrian's family and friends.

Having known Adrian since the mid 1990s I always knew he possessed tremendous will and independence of mind. These past 7 years however demonstrated strength, courage and pursuit of passion that was simply inspiring.

Thank you Adrian for the good times, the clematis and the reminder of what is possible.

Robert Squires

Danielle Stewart

Posted at 06:22pm
Dear Kate, Ron, Rebecca and Christian.
I was so sad when I read of your sweet Adrian’s passing. Just know I am thinking of you during this time of mourning....a dear son, brother and uncle. In time, special memories of his life will give you peace and comfort. With my deepest condolences and love.
Danielle Stewart (Dani)

Lynn Connor

Posted at 04:06pm
Kate and Ron, Our deepest sympathy. Adrian fought this battle so bravely. Please know that you are in our thoughts. Lynn Connor and Darrell MacIsaac

June & Eddie Lindeman

Posted at 02:26pm
Kate, Ron, Rebecca & Christian ~ It was with a heavy heart & deep sadness that I read of your loving Adrian’s passing. Though it had been many years since I had seen Adrian, he was always a gentle soul & a true gentleman. Our heartfelt condolences, thoughts & prayers are with you in your time of sorrow & in the days ahead. May you gain peace & solace in your many priceless & precious memories. Sending you comforting hugs. RIP Adrian ~ fly high with the angels as you watch over your family & those you held close to your heart.

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